“We have an innate propensity 
to get ourselves noticed, and 
noticed favorably, by our kind.”
William James

Recently, I’ve been reading, and very much enjoying, What Matters Most and Why, by Jim Manney. His book seeks to unearth insights on a number of life questions: How can I find meaning and joy? What’s valuable in life? What’s irrelevant? and What do I really want in life? I have found the book to be both inspirational and challenging.

Manney’s book includes the quote above, by philosopher William James. Manney was writing about feelings of specialness and happiness, beginning with a reference to ancient Greek epic poem, The Iliad, in which the great warrior, Achilles, must decide between continuing in battle, with the likelihood of dying a hero who would be long remembered, or returning to his home in Phthia, where he would live happily ever after with his loved ones, but die in obscurity. Achilles chose to continue fighting and die a hero. 

Achilles was addicted to fame. It was important to him that he be remembered, in a positive light, long after his death. This is certainly an appropriate example of what James was speaking of in the quote above. 

That was then, but even now, there seems to be a strong desire by many to be noticed. Today, however, dying in battle isn’t necessarily going to achieve this goal. Rather, with the various options available to us through social media, an individual can wage an intense campaign of self-promotion (and self-adulation) capable of reaching millions of people worldwide. We’ve even come up with a term to refer to these people — influencers. 

Of course, there are those who legitimately influence others in a positive way. No small number of individuals utilize social media to share their knowledge and expertise on various topics with the intention of helping readers, viewers, and followers to improve their lives. There are those, however, whose sole intention is to shine the spotlight of attention on themselves in an effort to be noticed, and ultimately liked, by others. 

While such a campaign may appear to be effective for a period of time, it seems that most people eventually see through the self-glorifying glitz of the poster and recognize that this façade can be compared to the Wizard of Oz being exposed behind the curtain. Despite all the overblown images, exaggerated depictions of success, and, in some cases, expressions of false humility, self-promotion of this kind tends to drive people away. The fact of the matter is that we are not special. None of us! We are all ordinary people doing ordinary (and occasionally extraordinary) things in our lives.

Most people I know would appreciate the authenticity of their friends and acquaintances, recognizing that in spite of their faults and imperfections, they are genuinely good humans deserving of love and respect exactly as they are. 

To become famous as a result of your outstanding accomplishments is an honor. To actively and intentionally seek fame, however, is, for the most part, both futile and unfulfilling.