“A friend may be waiting
behind a stranger’s face.” 
Maya Angelou

It was so easy when I was younger. In my early childhood, I could walk up to another young person in the sandbox at the park and innocently ask, “Can I play with you?” It was a simple question, and the intention of the question was quite clear. That same question today, if posed to someone my age in a social setting, might result in a slap across the face.

During my high school years, it was fairly easy to strike up a conversation with another high school age student by asking where they attend school or where they went for elementary school. This could lead to a conversation about possible mutual friends and interests.

In my college years, the first conversation with someone new might involved the double-question: “Where are you from? What’s your major?” They were fairly safe, generic questions which had the potential to get the ball rolling. 

When I happen to meet someone who tells me they’re from San Francisco, there’s a tried and true script which must be followed. The first question is “Where’d you go to school?” If they are truly from San Francisco, they instinctively know you’re asking about the high school they attended. That simple introductory question usually opens the door to a number of follow-up questions. “What year did you graduate? Did you know…(fill in the blank with someone’s name)?” These three questions should be more than sufficient to begin an engaging conversation about common friends and experiences. 

In fifteen days, I’ll celebrate my 70th birthday. Opportunities to meet new friends don’t come up quite as often as they used to. Of course, it’s possible to begin a friendship with a simple “Hello,” but even this could be met with suspicion. So it’s an absolute delight when I take the risk to greet someone and the response is warm and hospitable. Meeting new friends shouldn’t be such a challenge, and yet it can be. 

I think it might be helpful to remind ourselves that we’re all part of the human family, and therefore we are all connected. I am reminded of this interconnectedness when I meet someone new. Given the demographics of Silicon Valley, meeting new people invites me to recognize the beauty in the diversity of the people I meet. Whether the person is from upstate New York, downtown Campbell, or somewhere in Africa, every person I meet has a unique story to tell. I’m grateful and honored when others trust me with their stories. I always take the time to listen attentively… and to learn.

The truth is, we just never know how meeting someone new might change the course of our life. While attending a celebration in Kingston, Jamaica in late July 1971, I met many people I did not know. Three years later, one of those individuals contacted me and offered me a job teaching in a high school in the Bahamas. That job led to my decision to devote my life to teaching here in California. 

The keys to unlocking the incredible potential of meeting new people are an open heart and an open mind. These two gifts invite and encourage people to share their stories and the things about which they are passionate. When we happen to connect with someone who has a shared passion, great things can happen.

The more we open ourselves up to meeting new people, the more opportunities seem to come our way. My motivation for meeting new people isn’t necessarily related to potential opportunities, yet when I embrace the unknown of meeting someone new, I’ve learned that magic can happen. There is a vulnerability to opening ourselves up to meeting a person we do not know, but the benefits of doing so far outweigh the risks.