“A great marriage is not
when the ‘perfect couple’
comes together. It’s when
an imperfect couple learns
to enjoy their differences.” 
Dave Meurer 

As of today, by the grace of God, Kathy and I are both alive and well. We’ve been blessed with three impressive sons and five delightful grandchildren. Through the years, we welcomed two extraordinary daughters-in-law into our family. We certainly have much for which to be grateful.

Kathy and I also both enjoyed successful professional careers, positions which challenged us to grow, to learn, to serve, and to hold firm to our values in workplaces which were not always healthy or enjoyable. Our jobs provided opportunities for us to stretch ourselves to take on roles and tasks we may have initially felt unqualified to undertake. Through these experiences, we learned that we’d been gifted with strengths we didn’t realize we possessed. Sometimes we need other people who are able to see in us what we don’t see in ourselves… until we do.

I met Kathy on August 9, 1984. We were married on June 29, 1985. Some might think that, since we had not known each other for very long, we didn’t know each other well enough to commit ourselves to each other in marriage. They would be right. We didn’t. Despite this potential obstacle, today we celebrate our 40th wedding anniversary.

There are two ways to approach marriage. One option is to wait until we find the perfect match — the person who possess all the traits and characteristics one would desire in a life partner. The other is to confidently move forward in a relationship with someone about whom there are things we don’t yet know, committed to getting to know that person over time and willing to accept them as they are. This describes my relationship with Kathy. We are not perfect, yet in our imperfection, we make a pretty good team.

Kathy and I have both changed significantly in the past forty years. I would like to think that most of those changes have been for the better. I’m grateful that Kathy has been tolerant and accepting of the ways I have changed. It has been said that the person we marry is not the same person we are married to forty years later. Actually, it IS the same person, but we are different in many ways — and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

So as Kathy and I celebrate our 40th anniversary, I am grateful for the person Kathy is today. I am grateful for her kindness, her willingness to tolerate my foibles, her commitment to our sons and their families, her desire to embrace learning as a lifelong task, and her desire to continue our journey together into a fifth decade. To borrow a line from the legendary Yankee first baseman, Lou Gehrig, “Today I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth.”