“Suffering gives a  
human depth, 
humility, and  
compassion.” 
Eckhart Tolle

We live in a culture which trains us, from our earliest days, to see life as a competition. During our years in school, we compare height, test scores, grades, playing time on athletic teams, and awards earned. As we get older, we find ourselves comparing car types, social media followers, salaries, vacation destinations, and the square footage of our homes. This experience of comparison has a significant effect on how we view the world in which we live. It also affects how we see ourselves and those around us, because we may perceive the success of others as a personal threat.

When this mindset takes hold, it becomes difficult, if not impossible, to embrace the trust and cooperation that holds our society together. Not only do we trust less and cooperate less, we actually become less. When we accept that life is nothing more than a competition, we lose our ability to feel and show compassion for others.

It’s not healthy for us to feel threatened by the success of others. It’s not healthy for us to measure the lives of others against our own. It’s absolutely essential that we recognize that the pie of life is not finite. There’s more than enough to go around,… if we are willing to take only what we need and leave the rest for others.

When we begin to see others as fellow human beings, rather than competitors, compassion becomes a natural response. Only then are we able to recognize that there is no shortage of compassionate people around us. I am reminded of a quote my mother shared with me on many occasions: “There, but for the grace of God, go I.”

Compassionate people are well aware that they cannot solve the world’s problems alone. They accept the reality that changing even one life can be rewarding. We don’t need to fix everything to do something. As Mother Teresa taught us, “If you can’t feed 100 people, then feed just one.”

It is so easy for us to see someone going through a difficult time and judge them. Thomas Merton, an American Trappist monk, wrote, “Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy.” For us to help others, whether it is with money, time, wisdom, or experience, we must believe that they are worthy of our assistance — no matter what. 

We may not be the wealthiest people in our neighborhood. We may not own the biggest house or the nicest car. We may not have more followers on social media than other people we know, but we all have something we can share with those who are in need of assistance. It might be something as simple as a smile, an acknowledgement that the other person exists, or a few minutes of our time to engage them in conversation. 

Author Joshua Becker wrote, “In our culture, the prescribed cure for insignificance is to accumulate — wealth, possessions, accolades, followers. But that prescription has never worked… Meaningful living has always belonged to those who have learned to give themselves to others.”

This I know for sure: the more we show compassion to others, the more our lives will improve.