“Silent gratitude 
isn’t much use 
to anyone.” 
Gertrude Stein

One of the first social skills we learned as toddlers was to say “Thank you.” When someone gave us something or did something nice for us, we were taught to express our sincere appreciation with a simple expression of gratitude. Why is it, then, that it’s so easy for us to take so much for granted later in life?

On the weekend of November 10-12, 2006, I attended a retreat at the Jesuit Retreat Center in Los Altos, California. The theme of the retreat was A Moment’s Pause for Gratitude. I signed up for the retreat because I was intrigued by the title — and because I needed a break from the stresses of work and family life. I thought a weekend retreat would provide just what I needed. Little did I know that my life would be forever changed by the experience.

I honestly don’t remember any of the specifics of the retreat. What I do remember is that between my arrival at the retreat center on Friday afternoon and my departure on Sunday afternoon, I became acutely aware of how blessed my life had been — and how seldom I acknowledged or expressed my gratitude to others. It was twenty years ago today that my “gratitude journey” began.

William Arthur Ward wrote, “To feel gratitude and not express it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” I think most of us feel, at least to some extent, a sense of gratitude for the many ways we’ve been blessed. Despite this, it is quite common that we fail to express that gratitude to those who should hear it.

I grew up in San Francisco, thought by some to be the most beautiful City in the world. The Pacific Ocean, the Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco Bay, Golden Gate Park, Glen Canyon, the Presidio, Sigmund Stern Grove, Lake Merced, Twin Peaks, Land’s End,… There is so much for which to be grateful in San Francisco, yet, in my younger years, I took it all for granted.

I have eyes that see, ears that hear, and fingers that feel. I can walk, talk, write, read, and carry on an intelligent conversation with another person. I’ve had a wonderful career in education. I was blessed with loving parents, wonderful siblings, and a faith to sustain me through challenging times. I am married to someone who loves me more than I deserve and who has been a consistently patient, compassionate, caring mother to our three sons and now our five grandkids.

I was 52 years old twenty years ago today. It took me that long to embrace the importance of gratitude in my life and to begin to see the people and world around me through the lens of gratitude. For twenty years now, I’ve made an effort to share my passion for gratitude through my teaching, writing, speaking, and everyday example. My focus on gratitude has been life-changing for me.

As you read this today, ask yourself: What is something (or someone) for which I am grateful right now?