A Beacon of Light

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  • My name is Kevin Carroll. I was born and raised in San Francisco, California, where I attended Saint Ignatius College Preparatory. I am a graduate of both Santa Clara University and the University of San Francisco. Following a 40-year career in teaching and pastoral ministry, I launched a new career as a writer and speaker.

    I live in San José, California. My wife, Kathy, and I have three adult sons and five precious grandchildren. I have much for which to be grateful.

    I can be reached via email at kmc43sjc@gmail.com

    My books are available for purchase online from Amazon. I also have copies of some of these titles at my home for those who would like to buy them directly from me.

    A Moment’s Pause for Gratitude  (2017)

    Cherries in the Summer  (2021)

    The Ambassador of 38th Avenue  (2022)

    Dad: 12 Questions…  (2023)

    A Focus on Gratitude  (2024)

    Through the Lens of Gratitude  (2024)

    A Bahamian Odyssey (2026)

  • Sacred Spaces

    “All space is sacred space
    when you remember that
    God is within you.”
    ~ Christiane Northrup

    Life can be complicated. We all experience this challenge from time to time, some more frequently than others. Occasionally, the words of the Southwest Airlines television commercial seem to call out to us: Wanna get away? Yes, that would be nice. Unfortunately, escaping to an island paradise for a week or two isn’t always an option. It is critical for our physical and mental health to find ways to get away right where we live.

    Kathy recently met a woman with whom she has developed a warm friendship. They met at a conference in Ojai, California in February. The woman, Jules Blaine Davis, is the author of The Kitchen Healer, a book Kathy had purchased and started reading just a few weeks before the conference. When she bought the book, Kathy was unaware that she would have the opportunity to meet and befriend the author.

    I have not read the book myself, so I cannot tell you what it’s about. I can tell you, however, that it has made a positive difference in Kathy’s life, and in mine. Since reading the book and conversing with Jules, Kathy has created a few sacred spaces in our home. These are areas set aside for personal reflection, meditation, and prayer, or to help us create a sense of the sacred in a particular room. One sacred space now occupies a corner of the kitchen counter. (See photo above.) Setting it up required a bit of rearranging of kitchen appliances, but the payoff has been significant.

    Kathy included some flowers, a collection of rocks, a candle, and a framed painting for the sacred space in the kitchen. When preparing meals, Kathy lights the candle and is reminded of the presence of the sacred in the ordinary.

    Each morning, and sometimes later in the evening, Kathy sets up a sacred space in the living room. This one has to be taken down prior to the arrival of the grandkids each day. In this space, Kathy uses one or more candles, an arrangement of flowers, and relaxing music. Sometimes she reads material that nourishes her soul, or engages in journal writing. And there are times when she simply sits in her comfortable chair, savoring her morning coffee, and reflecting on life. What a great way to start each day.

    The benefits of creating and making use of sacred spaces are plentiful. Doing so relieves stress, brings new energy to one’s life, and increases self-awareness. Spending time in our sacred space provides the “me time” so often lacking in our lives, time which allows us to process our thoughts and feelings. This practice also opens the doors of possibility to experiencing sacramental moments, periods when we are consciously aware of and attentive to the presence of God in our life.

    Creating a sacred space is not difficult, nor is it expensive. The return on the investment, however, is priceless. 

  • Doing for Others

    “One of the deep
    secrets in life
    is that all that is
    really worth doing
    is what we do for others.”
    ~ Lewis Carroll

    When I think back on all the life lessons I’ve learned, and all the wisdom I’ve gained, throughout my lifetime, this Lewis Carroll (no relation) quote just might be the most important of all. I learned this lesson at a very young age, yet only today did I realize that it is attributed to the famous author.

    I first learned about the importance of caring for the needs of others from two other Carrolls — Tom and Peg Carroll, my parents. From my earliest days, through their words and example, they impressed upon my siblings and me the value of being aware of the needs of others and of doing whatever we can do to respond to those needs. It is a lesson we have all embraced.

    My brother, Tom, has devoted his life to ministry as a Jesuit priest. In that role, he has been a teacher, counselor, and spiritual director to countless men and women around the world. My sister, Cathy, used her love of math to teach in both Catholic and public schools. She then accepted a position with an educational consulting organization which allowed her to travel the country and the world instructing math teachers in more effective methods of teaching math in the classroom. My sister, Peggy, worked as an occupational therapist, helping patients who had experienced a stroke or debilitating spinal cord injury to develop the physical agility skills they would need to enable them to be as independent and self-reliant as possible upon their return to their own homes. 

    My professional career in education and pastoral ministry was focused on serving others and teaching my students about the importance of doing so in their lives. 

    As I prepare to celebrate the conclusion of my 70th year on earth two months from today, I do so with a tremendous sense of accomplishment. The opportunities I’ve had to make a positive difference in the lives of my students have been an absolute blessing. My Dad always urged me to follow my heart, rather than the money. It’s true that he was saddened that I did not accept the job with the San Francisco Fire Department when it was available to me in the late ‘70s, but his disappointment was not so much with the financial implications of that decision. His frustration had more to do with the fact that it was through a career in firefighting that he had lived a life of service to others. 

    I would be remiss not to mention my mother’s role in reinforcing the importance of a life lived for others. In my lifetime, Mom’s vocation was one of constant service, care, and unconditional love from the moment I was born in 1954 right up to the moment of her death in 2022. As a mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother, Mom served as a beacon of inspiration for all who knew her. Even in her final years, when she lived at the Villa Siena Retirement Community in Mountain View, Mom found ways to be of service to a number of the residents she met there. Doing for others was simply what she did. It was what she had done throughout her entire lifetime.

    “Life’s most persistent
    and urgent question is:
    What are you doing for others?”
    ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

  • Kindness

    “True kindness expects
    nothing in return.”
    ~ Roy T. Bennett

    I’m sitting on the deck of my sister’s home in San Mateo as I write this. It’s comfortably warm and partly sunny. Clouds are slowly moving in with rain predicted for later tonight. The sound of the traffic on the street below is tolerable. The occasional horn blasts of the trains passing through San Mateo are actually a bit romantic. What an ideal setting to do a little writing.

    My sister, Cathy, underwent a significant medical procedure at Mills Peninsula Hospital yesterday. The surgery went well and her prognosis for a full recovery is very good. She’s fortunate to have a wonderful friend who was an oncology nurse at Stanford Medical Center for many years. Maureen has been assisting Cathy throughout this process, but had a scheduling conflict for today — volunteering at bingo in her local parish, where they would be celebrating the 100th birthday of three parishioners today. So I’m here in San Mateo providing a bit of companionship for my sister.

    It is an absolute pleasure and honor for me to have the opportunity to be with Cathy again today. Her entire life has been one of kindness to me and to many others. People often speak of karma. Well, Cathy has accumulated a healthy supply of good karma for all the things she has done through the years for so many people. Now, in her time of need, her family and friends are grateful for the opportunity to care for her the way she has cared for us.

    For the next few weeks, friends will be providing dinners for Cathy. If last night’s dinner is any indication of what’s to come, she will be eating quite well. I didn’t ask her how many people will be providing meals, but I get a sense that Cathy won’t have to cook for quite a while. I’m sure others feel as I do — that caring for her during this time is a gift for which we are grateful, rather than an expectation or chore.

    Kevin Heath, the CEO of More4Kids, said, “Wherever there is a human in need, there is an opportunity for kindness and to make a difference.”

    Cathy has spent her life offering kindness to others, professionally, socially, and personally. In doing so, she has made a positive difference in the lives of countless individuals. Now, in her time of need, Cathy is experiencing the joy of being on the receiving end of the kindness of others. It is heartwarming to see so many people reaching out to her to provide assistance.

    Cathy has clearly embraced the words of the Dalai Lama, who said, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

    The clouds seem to have overtaken the sun. Only small patches of blue sky are still visible, and a cold wind has picked up. So grateful for this day. 

  • Seize the Day!

    “The first of April
    is the day we remember
    what we are the other
    364 days of the year.”
    ~ Mark Twain

    In their popular 1976 hit song Fly Like an Eagle, the Steve Miller Band sang about the passage of time: “Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’ slippin’ into the future.” Without a doubt, it most certainly does. And as many have pointed out through the years, getting older is a bit like using toilet paper. The closer we get to the end of the roll, the faster it spins.

    Another March is in the books. April 2024 is upon us, and with it, a glimmer of hope for a future of unlimited possibilities. As I look ahead to the next four weeks, I’m grateful for numerous opportunities to get together with family and friends. I’ll also give one presentation on the topic of gratitude in Mountain View, attend a book launch for a friend who recently published two new titles, give one guided tour of San Francisco to a friend who grew up in Southern California, and attend another concert, a tribute to Paul McCartney, with Kathy. April promises to be a memorable month.

    Today and tomorrow, we get a brief preview of the warmer, sunny days ahead. No doubt, we’ll get more rain in April, but that’s to be expected. We all learned as children that “April showers bring May flowers,” so even the inevitable rain is a good thing. Like most people I know, I am more than ready for the arrival of summer weather.

    I’m also anticipating the publication of my newest book, Through the Lens of Gratitude. This book follows the format of my first publication, A Moment’s Pause for Gratitude (2017). In that book, I shared fifty brief stories of gratitude. Each story is followed by a couple of questions to encourage readers to reflect on gratitude in their own lives in light of the story told. Through the Lens… follows this same format, with fifty new stories. The book, which I’m confident is my best yet, should be available for purchase by May 1, 2024.

    Yes, time does keep on slippin’, so it is incumbent upon each of us to live in the moment, to be consciously aware of the joy and potential each day has to offer. When I was a teen, like most kids that age, I felt that I was invincible — that I would live forever. Well,… things have changed. I am well-aware of my mortality now, but I’m not afraid of it. I continue to be grateful for each new day given to me, and for the opportunities each new day presents. I will always remember and treasure the words of wisdom offered by Richard Jatta, the father of one of my former students, Jenifer, who lived his brief life embracing the Latin phrase, “Carpe diem,” which translates to “Seize the day.” He understood the importance of living in the present moment.

    Happy April!

  • Flower Power!

    “In joy or sadness,
    flowers are
    our constant friends.”
    ~ Okakura Kakuzo

    For the past month or so, Kathy and I have been visiting the downtown Campbell Farmers Market on Sunday mornings. Along with a variety of fresh fruit, health drinks, and other organic products, Kathy has also purchased several plants and bunches of colorful fresh flowers for our home. When we return home, she puts the flowers into decorative vases which are then placed throughout the living room, dining room, and kitchen. These flower arrangements have made a positive difference in the ambiance of our home. They certainly did today as we celebrated Easter with the family.

    Providing more than just an ornamental improvement to the home environment, fresh flowers have a number of documented health benefits, as well. Dr. Jeannette Haviland-Jones, a professor of psychology at Rutgers University in New Jersey, explained, “Science shows that not only do flowers make us happier than we know, they have a strong positive effect on our emotional well-being.”

    By increasing levels of serotonin in our body, flowers can significantly improve our moods, emotions, energy level, memory, sleep, happiness, and overall emotional well-being. At the same time, flowers have the ability to decrease levels of anxiety, stress, and depression.

    Research conducted at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center found that different types of flowers can be used to enhance different aspects of our health:

    Lavender promotes feelings of relaxation. Roses can be used as an anti-inflammatory and to treat coughs and colds. Chamomile soothes anxiety and headaches while aiding sleep and digestion. Honeysuckle has antiviral and antibiotic properties, enabling them to treat colds, flu, and sore throats. Chrysanthemums are used to treat dry eyes, fevers, and headaches. Magnolias can minimize nasal congestion and sinus headaches.

    All this sounds very promising, but the simple presence of flowers around our home has added a touch of class to our residence. Again today, I am grateful for the simple things in life.

  • Warming Up

    “March comes in like a lion
    and goes out like a lamb.”
    ~ English Proverb

    It appears that the words of this well-known proverb, the origin of which is uncertain, will prove to be accurate once again this year. It was raining with the high temperature in the mid-50ºs on Friday, March 1st. Today, on the last day of the month, after a light morning shower, South Bay residents will enjoy a partly-sunny day with a high temperature of 67º predicted for this afternoon. Then, as we transition into April, the lamb makes its presence known. How ironic as we celebrate Easter Sunday today. 

    The weather forecast for the first two days of April indicates a respite in the rain, with a high of 72º on Monday and 75º on Tuesday. What a great way to begin the new month.

    It’s been a good winter. With above-average rainfall, the water supply in the Bay Area is sufficient to get us through the summer and fall. I can only speak for myself, but I would think I’m not alone in being more than ready for warmer, dryer weather. Winter was nice, but I’m definitely looking forward to spending more time outside in the months ahead.

    March roars in like a lion
    With a bluster and a slam!
    And tiptoes out so gently
    Like a quiet little lamb.

     

  • Candlelight

    “Man loves company —
    even if it is only that
    of a small burning candle.”
    ~ G.C. Lichtenberg

    There are many things in life that nurture my soul. A lighted candle is one of them. Last month, while shopping at CVS, I happened to see a candle which caught my attention. It was made by WoodWick and, not surprisingly, it had a wooden wick. The selection of scents was minimal, so I selected one I thought I might like. In the month it sat on my desk here in my home office, I enjoyed it immensely. I lit it almost every night until, one night, it went out. The entire candle had been used up.

    Kathy and I were walking in the Valley Fair Mall the other night when we passed the Yankee Candle store. We stopped in to look around. Much to my delight, I found an extensive selection of WoodWick candles. I purchased two: one with a vanilla scent, the other with three levels of wax which create three different scents before the candle dies out. 

    What’s special about these candles is the wooden wick. It makes a gentle crackling sound as it burns. Having the candle on my desk is much like experiencing the coziness of a small fireplace in my work space. It is relaxing, soothing, and, yes, nurturing to my soul.

    The vanilla candle is burning on my desk this evening. The aroma is captivating. The flickering of the light is calming, and the crackling sound is mesmerizing. The candle contributes to a perfect environment for writing.  

    I must admit, I’m spoiled now. I’ve always enjoyed having a lighted candle in my work space, but now that I’ve experienced the WoodWick candle, no other candle will suffice. 

  • $1.00 Sixty Years Later

    “Dollars do better
    if they are
    accompanied by sense.”
    ~ Earl Riney

    One dollar. Two 50¢ pieces. Four quarters. Ten dimes. 100 pennies. Their value is all the same, and compared to its purchasing power in my childhood, it’s not worth much today.

    What could $1.00 buy sixty years ago — in 1964? Here are a few examples:

    • A dozen donuts
    • 20 Hershey’s bars
    • Two McDonald’s Big Macs
    • Three gallons of gas
    • One gallon of milk
    • One movie ticket
    • 20 first-class postage stamps
    • Four large boxes of Cheerios

    Things are a little different today:

    • A dozen donuts – $21.00
    • 20 Hershey’s bars – $27.80
    • Two McDonald’s Big Macs – $12.78 
    • Three gallons of gas – $14.28
    • One gallon of milk – $5.99
    • One movie ticket – $14.50
    • 20 first-class postage stamps – $13.60
    • Four large boxes of Cheerios – $33.96

    And then there’s real estate. My parents purchased their 38th Avenue home in San Francisco in 1956 for $18,500. My mother sold it in 2014 for more than one million dollars. Go figure.

    The website amortization.org reports that $1.00 in 1964 is equivalent to $9.93 in 2024!

    Okay, to be fair, income has increased, as well. The minimum wage in the State of California in 1964 was $1.30/hour. The State’s minimum wage as of January 1, 2024 is $16.00/hour, and as of April 1, 2024, some fast food workers will begin receiving a $20.00/hour minimum wage. 

    When I began my teaching career in the Catholic Diocese of San José in 1979, my first-year annual salary was $7,900. A first-year teacher today earns close to $50,000/year. I cringe to think what a lay teacher in a Catholic school was making in 1964.

    One thing, for certain, has not changed. In the words of the ancient Roman philosopher Seneca, “It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor.”

  • The Older I Get

    “The greatness of a community
    is most accurately measured
    by the compassionate actions
    of its members.”
    ~ Coretta Scott King

    I have friends,… and I have family. Many members of my family are also my friends, and a good number of my friends are like family. The older I get, the more grateful I am for the gifts of these women and men in my life. Some of my friends are far better-off financially than I will ever be. The same can be said for a good number of my family members. This is not an issue for me. The most precious thing I have to share with my family and friends is my time — and we all get the same amount of time every day: 1,440 minutes, to be exact. Who said life isn’t fair?

    Former Supreme Court justice Sandra Day O’Connor offered this piece of advice for living a good life: “Give freely of yourself always to your family, your friends, your community, and your country. The world will pay you back many times over.” Notice that Justice O’Connor did not say, “They will pay you back…” Rather, she said, “The world will pay you back…” So how, exactly, does this work?

    There are a number of resources that tell us that our actions affect our later experiences. These are not guaranteed consequences. Whether we do something good or something bad, however, it seems that fate does have a way of leveling the playing field. This concept can be traced back to Biblical times.

    In chapter three of Luke’s account of the Gospel story, we are told, “Give, and gifts will be given to you.” Saint Paul, in his letter to the Galatians, wrote, “A person will reap only what he sows.” Paul’s words are also reinforced by the popular idiom “What goes around comes around.” Some refer to this as karma — believing that the way we behave now will affect how we are treated in the future.

    Even Helen Keller, who was deprived of the gift of sight, yet was gifted with incredible vision, wrote, “The unselfish effort to bring cheer to others will be the beginning of a happier life for ourselves.” Yet another example of the cause and effect theory of life.

    So what does all this have to do with my family and friends? Well, in my younger years, I was so preoccupied with living my life, attending to my career, raising my family, and doing the things required of a responsible husband, father, and citizen, that I failed to truly appreciate the blessings of my family and friends. I took them all for granted. This is no longer the case.

    At this point in my life, I am making a conscientious effort to reach out to family and friends, to nurture those relationships, to share myself (my time) with them, and to do whatever I can to help them when they are in need of assistance. What I do for my friends and family may not be life-changing, but they are still worth the effort. The Greek storyteller Aesop taught us that “no act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.”

    Much has been written about finding one’s purpose in life. I’ve always appreciated artist Pablo Picasso’s take on this. He wrote, “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” Picasso’s words are in line with those of author Charles Dickens, who wrote, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of another.”

    I’m grateful for my family and friends. And I’m grateful for the 1,440 minutes of life I get each day. It is a blessing to have the ability and opportunity to use some of that time to reach out to others, to show compassionate concern for them, or to simply be there for them when that is what they need. Do I expect anything in return? No. Not at all. Yet I’m confident that when I am the one in need of attention or compassion, it will be there for me.

  • Gratitude at Dawn

    “What if today
    we were just grateful
    for everything?”
    ~ Charlie Brown

    My body has adopted a nice rhythm recently. I wake up every morning, without the need for an alarm clock, when I’ve had eight hours of sleep. If I go to bed at 11:00, I wake up at 7:00. When I get to bed early at 9:00, I wake up feeling refreshed at 5:00. It’s a great feeling. 

    More importantly, each night when I go to bed, I end my day with a moment’s pause for gratitude, reflecting on the people, experiences, and opportunities that have enriched my day. And when I wake up in the morning, my first thoughts revolve around the theme of gratitude — for my life, my health, my family, and the gift of a new day.

    Dr. Robert Holden, a British author who works in the field of positive psychology, wrote, “The miracle of gratitude is that it shifts your perception to such an extent that it changes the world you see.” This might help to explain the title of my soon-to-be-published book, Through the Lens of Gratitude. It’s true. Gratitude makes a difference!

    A woman approached me at the 75th anniversary celebration of Saint Gabriel School in San Francisco this past Saturday afternoon. She told me that she had read two of my books and asked, “How do you stay so positive, so joyful?” To be honest, I don’t recall ever thinking about this, but I knew immediately that the source of the joy in my life is gratitude.

    Author Ralph Blum was spot-on when he wrote, “There is a calmness to a life lived in gratitude, a quiet joy.” Since consciously embracing an attitude of gratitude in late 2006, despite a number of challenging situations in the years since that time, I have experienced a sense of calmness which has served me well. Life has not always been easy. Things have not consistently turned out as I would have liked, but a focus on gratitude has enabled me to maintain a calmness which allows me to embrace a quiet joy. 

    Karl Barth, a Swiss theologian who passed away when I was just a freshman in high school, also recognized a link between gratitude and joy. He wrote, “Joy is the simplest form of gratitude.” So does joy make us grateful or does gratitude make us joyful? 

    While this question may be debated at length, Brother David Steindl-Rast, a Benedictine monk known to many as the “grandfather of gratitude,” offered his response to the question. He said, “It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful.” I think he’s right.

    Because I have chosen to see the world around me through the lens of gratitude, I have been better able to accept life as it comes. While I’ve never been adept at playing the game of baseball, my focus on gratitude has enabled me to deal more effectively with the inevitable curveballs life tosses in my direction. I’ve learned to go with the flow, to adapt to what is, and to be grateful for all things.

    American journalist Germany Kent challenges us to wholeheartedly embrace gratitude in our lives. She encourages us to “Take time to reflect on all that you have. It may not be all that you want, but remember, someone somewhere is dreaming to have what you have.”

    What a wonderful reality to reflect upon as we begin each new day.